On my first day of school, I received RM5 from my dad. He told me to buy food during recess. I was pretty hungry that day and I needed to get food. Waiting for recess felt like the longest time, even though I had no idea what recess was. When it finally came, I went to the canteen to look for some FOOD. There were so many kids around pushing and shoving and screaming and laughing. We were supposed to queue up, but being kids, that did not happen.
For the longest time, I was standing at the very front, in front of the mak cik kantin, looking for something worth RM5. I couldn't find anything. Packets of tiny munchies and sweets for 50sen, 20sen, 10sen...and a super delicious mee goreng for RM1.
"Why?! Why is nothing RM5?! I'm so hungry!"
I didn't buy anything that day.
I went home and told my dad. He laughed at me, I didn't understand why.
The next day, he gave RM1 for my pocket money. Finally, I get to buy my mee goreng. Yay!
Note: I got RM1 until the end of form 3.
N
Monday, November 3, 2008
Saturday, November 1, 2008
Daydreaming
Angan-angan Mat Jenin. I know there's a story about Mat Jenin who likes to daydream. I just can't think of what he was daydreaming about and what happened to him. I know it wasn't something good.
Nevertheless, I still like to daydream.
I like fictional real characters. This means the character is 'loosely' based on a real person. I don't write about myself much. Maybe its some kind of phobia but I'm scared of revealing my 'inner' self. But everything is fine in fiction.
My fictional character would be called Zuhal, like the planet. (This name is partly inspired by 'Matahari' credits to YMF Kish). Zuhal is going to be following 'the Hero's journey'. He will have at least three different points in his life.
He starts of comfortable in his own world, content with whatever it is that he does. He then gets confronted with an unavoidable 'dillema/problem'. This could either be from an outside source or from within. I prefer the latter just because I find it can open up huge possibilities but it comes with the risk of being cliche. Zuhal then continues to travel through the second 'phase' of his fictional life, facing the aforementioned 'problem' (whatever it may be). Finally, he learns from this experience and this changes him. He would bring this new knowledge back to his original world to affect it somehow.
As you can see, Zuhal is still just an empty vessel at this stage and that's okay. Hopefully, I'll be able to paint him more in the future. A second observation could also be that this is quite a linear experience. This is true but that could be spiced up a little.
The HOW part is a totally different story.
N
Nevertheless, I still like to daydream.
I like fictional real characters. This means the character is 'loosely' based on a real person. I don't write about myself much. Maybe its some kind of phobia but I'm scared of revealing my 'inner' self. But everything is fine in fiction.
My fictional character would be called Zuhal, like the planet. (This name is partly inspired by 'Matahari' credits to YMF Kish). Zuhal is going to be following 'the Hero's journey'. He will have at least three different points in his life.
He starts of comfortable in his own world, content with whatever it is that he does. He then gets confronted with an unavoidable 'dillema/problem'. This could either be from an outside source or from within. I prefer the latter just because I find it can open up huge possibilities but it comes with the risk of being cliche. Zuhal then continues to travel through the second 'phase' of his fictional life, facing the aforementioned 'problem' (whatever it may be). Finally, he learns from this experience and this changes him. He would bring this new knowledge back to his original world to affect it somehow.
As you can see, Zuhal is still just an empty vessel at this stage and that's okay. Hopefully, I'll be able to paint him more in the future. A second observation could also be that this is quite a linear experience. This is true but that could be spiced up a little.
The HOW part is a totally different story.
N
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
The making of a fantastical world
These are probably some notes, yet again. I might blog again later tonight but for now...
Red leaves
Continued...
How would your version of a fantastical world be? What does it take to actually build it. From this morning ( before 'continued'), I've just came up with having red leaves. I think it'll also be nice if the bright sky was full of light pink clouds. The picture has to be crisp with the characters a bit less saturated. Vignettes would probably work out, a la Top Gear. The characters must also have the right wardrobe with the right color tones. I prefer dark colors ( against the bright-ish background). I know, this is all merely cosmetic.
Sometimes I think that whatever I write could make no sense to other people reading. It might be random but I need to get these thoughts out somewhere. Why not my blog. I used to be void of thoughts. Somehow, things are looking okay in my head. Maybe I need distractions.
*DETOUR*
I might do a quick bullshit count in my head.
Status: 2 events detected
Description: n/a
Solution: Bullshit 1 = n/a
Bullshit 2 = wait
*END DETOUR*
I'd like the fantastical world to be urban. in a city like KL (red KL trees). Secret alleys with magical lighting and sparkling fog. Random weird, magical people around doing random things that don't make sense. Maybe a fantasy night market. I'm just trying to pass the time here.
Night market:
1. Small stalls decorated to high taste but cheap.
2. People selling mind food. Or books in food form and literally digesting knowledge.
3. Street performers performing mind numbing magic tricks. Yet, in that world, it is normal.
4. Beggars begging for happiness.
5. Emotions in physical form. People carry their emotions on postcard sized notes around their necks like a necklace. They are able to change these emotions (if they have the corresponding card)
ENOUGH!
I could go on and on. I should spare some time to churn out more and more and more and more and more and more ideas (properly!). This might not be the right output vehicle. An online blog? Compared to making private notes (that only I can read), it's just more fun when you think somebody else would read these (meaningless) words.
N
Red leaves
Continued...
How would your version of a fantastical world be? What does it take to actually build it. From this morning ( before 'continued'), I've just came up with having red leaves. I think it'll also be nice if the bright sky was full of light pink clouds. The picture has to be crisp with the characters a bit less saturated. Vignettes would probably work out, a la Top Gear. The characters must also have the right wardrobe with the right color tones. I prefer dark colors ( against the bright-ish background). I know, this is all merely cosmetic.
Sometimes I think that whatever I write could make no sense to other people reading. It might be random but I need to get these thoughts out somewhere. Why not my blog. I used to be void of thoughts. Somehow, things are looking okay in my head. Maybe I need distractions.
*DETOUR*
I might do a quick bullshit count in my head.
Status: 2 events detected
Description: n/a
Solution: Bullshit 1 = n/a
Bullshit 2 = wait
*END DETOUR*
I'd like the fantastical world to be urban. in a city like KL (red KL trees). Secret alleys with magical lighting and sparkling fog. Random weird, magical people around doing random things that don't make sense. Maybe a fantasy night market. I'm just trying to pass the time here.
Night market:
1. Small stalls decorated to high taste but cheap.
2. People selling mind food. Or books in food form and literally digesting knowledge.
3. Street performers performing mind numbing magic tricks. Yet, in that world, it is normal.
4. Beggars begging for happiness.
5. Emotions in physical form. People carry their emotions on postcard sized notes around their necks like a necklace. They are able to change these emotions (if they have the corresponding card)
ENOUGH!
I could go on and on. I should spare some time to churn out more and more and more and more and more and more ideas (properly!). This might not be the right output vehicle. An online blog? Compared to making private notes (that only I can read), it's just more fun when you think somebody else would read these (meaningless) words.
N
Monday, October 27, 2008
Twists and turns
Something reminded me of the 'Never-ending Story'. How cool is that title.
I saw an old Bjork video. She finds a big book talking about her life. She brings this book to a publisher who loves it. Hence, it gets published and gains popularity. It turns into a play and shown to a packed theater. The publisher is among the crowd and Bjork is the star of the play. The play is about her finding a book, which turns into a play. So, in her play, there is another play with another group of people as crowds (the publisher is in this crowd as well).
confusing?! i don't remember the song name.
Adaptation:
Charlie Kaufman writes the screenplay. The movie is about Charlie Kaufman writing the screenplay to the movie that we're watching. How twisted. Synecdote, New York. Can't wait to see this genious' directorial debut.
I find these interesting, yet something is still missing. All these concepts are but a shell. I need to find the underlying essence, the core.
Unlike life, it is all make believe.
I have an idea for a project.
N
I saw an old Bjork video. She finds a big book talking about her life. She brings this book to a publisher who loves it. Hence, it gets published and gains popularity. It turns into a play and shown to a packed theater. The publisher is among the crowd and Bjork is the star of the play. The play is about her finding a book, which turns into a play. So, in her play, there is another play with another group of people as crowds (the publisher is in this crowd as well).confusing?! i don't remember the song name.
Adaptation:
Charlie Kaufman writes the screenplay. The movie is about Charlie Kaufman writing the screenplay to the movie that we're watching. How twisted. Synecdote, New York. Can't wait to see this genious' directorial debut.
I find these interesting, yet something is still missing. All these concepts are but a shell. I need to find the underlying essence, the core.
Unlike life, it is all make believe.
I have an idea for a project.
N
notes to self
ON NLP
1. key to unlocking potential
2. can lead to developing innovative and effective skills
3. what people believe is more significant to their lives than what is real/true
4. we have great wisdom in our subconscious mind
5. people are complex adaptive learning 'systems', surrounded by and communicating with other complex systems (world)
6. reality has to be seen in context
ON SCHIZO
1. delusions
2. altered states
3. hallucination, unlike dreaming, involves consciousness
ON REALITY
ON TIME
*note: this is an incomplete post. It has no meanings or intentions. A mere act of putting pen to paper. Fingers to keyboard to data to cyberspace. We live in a highly complex world and any attempt to fully understand it is futile. Or is it?
N
1. key to unlocking potential
2. can lead to developing innovative and effective skills
3. what people believe is more significant to their lives than what is real/true
4. we have great wisdom in our subconscious mind
5. people are complex adaptive learning 'systems', surrounded by and communicating with other complex systems (world)
6. reality has to be seen in context
ON SCHIZO
1. delusions
2. altered states
3. hallucination, unlike dreaming, involves consciousness
ON REALITY
ON TIME
*note: this is an incomplete post. It has no meanings or intentions. A mere act of putting pen to paper. Fingers to keyboard to data to cyberspace. We live in a highly complex world and any attempt to fully understand it is futile. Or is it?
N
Saturday, October 25, 2008
KERENAH II
I thought i wasn't really clear when i posted about people's 'kerenah' HERE! I found the perfect example. A picture tells a thousand words. But how much information is in an audio clip?
This is right on the dot because I was thinking more in the sense of customer service. Please let us not be like this. Our nation needs to wisen up.
CLICK!
N
This is right on the dot because I was thinking more in the sense of customer service. Please let us not be like this. Our nation needs to wisen up.
CLICK!
N
Friday, October 24, 2008
memories
I remember a nursery. I was there most of the time when I was about 3-4 years old. I used to play hide and seek with the other kids there. I was one of the youngest there. (At present, I'm not apart of the younger crowd anymore but things are changing a bit). Also at that time, it was just me and my brother in the family. No younger sisters yet. We used to have to take naps during the day. It was a fun time but I always missed my parents and would wanna go home.
I remember my first music class in primary school. I was scold for swearing, and I didn't even realize it. We were learning how to read notes. You know, the one on paper...F.A.C.E..."Fucker!" I shouted in class. That was how I learnt about swear words. I was 7.
I remember having a blue tricycle. My brother had the exact same one but it was red instead. They had plastic rims and the wheels were full rubber. As we grew older, we adjusted the two 'support' wheels ourselves to turn it into a proper bicycle. We grew too quickly and before I knew it, I was too heavy for it to support. The plastic rims gave in and smashed into pieces.
I remember quite a significant amount of my childhood. Somehow older memories tend to stick better than recent ones. These past 5-10 years just seem to pass in a blur. Before we know it, everything is too fast and blurred that it becomes blinding. Nothing but white light.
I wonder if we have memories of the future.
N
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